Nothing's New

And in the last few moments, you see it, what was once admiration, is now reduced to pity.

'And how long will you love me for?'

—

'Always. Always and every day.'

Do you ever think, sometimes, that somewhere along the way you messed up on some things? Have you ever been at the point when you know it’s ending, but you just want to spend whatever’s left of it that you can salvage with them before it ends? Have you told yourself you’re not at fault, but it still offers you no comfort? And in the last few moments, you see it, what was once admiration, is now reduced to pity.

‘I had all, and most of you, some and now none of you’

Does it ever cross your mind what they’re doing, how their day goes, what routines they follow, if they have a new favourite dress, a new job, maybe even seeing someone new? Things you used to know, things you never needed to ask about. How do you return to normalcy like no one saw you fall? How do you keep your chin up with the bruises? Does it hurt more when someone says ‘sorry’?

‘Sometimes I fear, that love destroys’

At some point you come to terms with it, ‘you can't love someone into loving you back’, you can only try, and try as you might, being nice to others won’t make them nice to you. I sometimes worry that I love something to destruction, you know how plants need water to survive, but if you give too much it dies of water-logging, and how you’d fire a clay pot to make it strong, but a little too much and you’ll crack the pot.

p.s. I did love you always, as it was a decision, just like getting up from bed to go to work every day is a decision (well, until you get laid off, haha)